Irreconcilable Differences

When our only child was born in the early years of the Culture Wars, my husband and I asked ourselves ‘what will he have to do to shock us?’ Today, my son divorced me.

Dear Brick,

I accept that you like to fight. Accept that I don’t. When the push notification arrived, I thought it was a scam. Then a prank. Then a cry for help. Now, I accept that you sincerely wish to divorce your parents. I accept that some 16-bit municipal algorithm could not compute a valid reason to deny your suit. Your Otherfather says I shouldn’t contact you, that it will jeopardize our appeal. I can’t not try. I co-created you. I raised you. I know what makes you tick. I know that if you hear what I’m about to say, you will choose to act differently.

Brick: your deepest desire is unnatural.

I choose my language carefully. My own father used that word - unnatural - in an inaccurate way to describe my love for your Otherfather, our marriage, and the legal actions we took to affirm our right to conceive you. My response then, now, always:

“natural is what happens in nature. We are part of nature, ergo, anything we do is natural.”

My father disagreed. He could not reconcile him…