Irreconcilable Differences

When our only child was born in the early years of the Culture Wars, my husband and I asked ourselves ‘what will he have to do to shock us?’ Today, my son divorced me.

Dear Brick,

I accept that you like to fight. Accept that I don’t. When the push notification arrived, I thought it was a scam. Then a prank. Then a cry for help. Now, I accept that you sincerely wish to divorce your parents. I accept that some 16-bit municipal algorithm could not compute a valid reason to deny your suit. Your Otherfather says I shouldn’…